Fuck college too, and fuck the bankers behind it. Did you know that it’s possible to sign up for an undischargeable loan at the age of fifteen?
The Idiot's Comprehensive Guide to Internet Sociopathy and Biological Phenomena
what the fuck is a #gamergate
I have some questions about this whole “#gamergate” affair.
1) Is this another Anita Sarkeesian thing? I thought we all agreed that the reason we don’t like her is not because she’s a woman, but because she’s a liar and a con artist.
2) Even saying “hashtag gamer gate” makes me feel like a tool. Who names this shit? Why does every controversy have to have a “hashtag” and a “gate” associated with it? How are we going to explain to future generations that a major linguistic concept in the English language derived from the name of a fucking hotel in a D.C. neighborhood called “Foggy Bottom”? How close were we, historically speaking, to having to listen to some asshole talk about “#gamerfoggybottom”? Are we all idiots?
3) Who the fuck reads game journalism? Game journalism is arguably worse than real journalism, and that’s saying something considering that real journalists are so lacking in standards and principles that they’ve decided that the only important news story in the world is an Ebola epidemic in the United States that doesn’t exist. Video game publications have a reputation for being more corrupt than some African warlords. You know what’s a good indicator of low intelligence? Taking Kotaku and Game Informer seriously.
4) What is “gamer identity”? Listen, I don’t know which of us sweaty nerds thought that we were going to construct a coherent culture based on gaming, but the writing was on the wall before Tetris was invented. Where do you live, Neverland? Culture is forbidden in the United States. It gets in the way of business. It’s profitable to blow up a culture; it adulterates the special aspects of the culture with cheap trash to make it more accessible to the unwashed masses while depriving the members of the culture a big part of their identities so that they might buy more expensive crap in order to fill their empty lives. Do you even capitalism, bro?
5) Why do we care whether women are developing video games or not? Is there some big untapped resource of women with good ideas who are being prevented from becoming game designers? Or is it more likely that a bunch of cultural vultures discovered video games as a medium for spreading progressive propaganda and are upset that people generally don’t like that shit in their leisure activities?
6) What’s wrong with you people?
People keep posting ‘what’s REALLY in your food’ articles like I’m gonna stop eating whatever it’s about lmao
Listen, death is coming. Death is coming. Pass me a hot dog.
After years of observing the loony left’s wrong-headed attempts to improve civil society by destroying it while self-proclaimed conservatives with the mental power of a dead car battery lead the country into a ditch, I’m thinking of changing my official political views to “contrarian”.
Have you ever sat back and reflected on your personal love life like
"Who would want to date me, I wouldn’t even want to date myself to save myself"
Being a fan of classical music is weird, because you want to tell your friends about the songs you like but it’s always
"Hey check out this new piece of music I just found! And by new, I mean it’s three hundred years old."
sometimes when I ask a girl out the first thing I think immediately after the words leave my mouth is “oh god, kill me now, I regret everything”